Chapter 9 - How I Spent My Summer Vacation

Despite Sidney’s comments about my drinking, I got pissed out of my mind and ended up spending the night on their couch since I could barely walk, let alone drive. When I woke up the next afternoon (though I had heard Eric and Sidney leave earlier in the day to go to practice). My head ached and all I wanted to do was take a shower but I had woken to hearing Sidney cussing from his bedroom, and of course, curiosity killed the cat.

I wandered down the hall. “What’s wrong?” I asked running a hand through my hair.

“Fucking psychology project.” He grumbled.

“What’s the project about?” I asked, curious.

“The early stages of childhood and how parents influence development.” He said shrugging. “Or something.”

I laughed. “Well its actually pretty simple.” I said. “Just think about your own early childhood and how your parents impacted behaviour and attitudes towards child-rearing made you who you are today.”

“What do you mean?” He asked, looking a little interested now.

“Well…” I said slowly. “Clearly your parents encouraged you to be the best that you could be at everything you did. You’re the oldest child, and as such, you are something of a perfectionist or more goal-oriented or whatever… that’s birth order theory at least. Your parents believed in you and encouraged you to believe in yourself. They taught you discipline and love through love and discipline. That means your parents were probably authoritative, especially since you appear to be self-reliant and socially responsible. That’s Baumrind’s theory at least.”

“Whose Baumrind? What’s his theory?” Sidney asked.

“Not his, hers.” I said. “Diana Baumrind believed that there were three basic parenting styles that impact the development of children, particularly as adolescents. Authoritarian parents, who are characterized as restrictive and punitive; authoritative parents who encourage independence but still place limits and controls on behaviours; and permissive parents, who are broken down into two further categories. Neglectful – where parents are completely uninvolved, and indulgent – parents are highly involved but place no demands on behaviour.” I explained. “All of that explains why we are the way we are.”

“So you think my parents were authoritative?” He said, leaning back in his chair, his hands behind his head. “What makes you think that?”

“Well you seem far too well adjusted for authoritarian parenting.” I said seriously. “And you have too much self-control for that. You’re self-control also rules out permissive parents… you wouldn’t be as good as you supposedly are at hockey with permissive parents, because you wouldn’t have the self-control to work independently to get as good as you supposedly are. If your parents were authoritarian, you might behave more like, say, Robbie Schremp… tons of talent but questionable personality.”

“You actually like this psychology stuff don’t you?” He said, looking surprised.

I shrugged. “Kind of.” I said, not wanting to tell him that I’d spent a lot of time in therapy after Frankie died, and I’d picked up on a lot of things as a result.

“So if my parents are authoritative, what are yours?” He asked.

“Does it matter?” I asked.

He shrugged. “I’m just curious.”

“Well remember, a lot of what our parents do during the early stages of our development impacts who and what we become as we get older.” I said. “Even if things change.”

“Why would parenting styles change?” He asked.

“A lot of things could make a parent change how they parent.” I said. “Divorce in particular often causes previously authoritative parents to become permissive or authoritarian. Or it can make a parent who was authoritarian authoritative, though not likely.”

“Are your parents divorced?” He asked, still leaning back in his chair.

“No.” I said simply.

“So why did they send you to live out here with your Aunt?” He asked.

I shook my head. “No offense Sidney, but I don’t want to talk about it.” I shrugged. “I told Michelle, Catrine and Claire so that they could gossip and let it get around so that I wouldn’t have to talk about it.”

Sidney shrugged. “I try not to listen to too much gossip. It’s usually erroneous at best.”

I gaped at him. He used the word “erroneous” correctly in a sentence. No guy I knew back home had diction like that. “Umm I’m going to go take a shower if that’s okay.”

“No problem.” He said. “Thanks for the help.”

“No problem.” I echoed. “Thanks for letting me crash here.”

He looked up at me, a devastating smile on his face. “It wasn’t so much a matter of letting you as it was you passing out and us not tossing your in a snow bank.”

I shrugged. “Well thanks either way.”

“No problem.” He said, his eyes suddenly serious as he looked at me contemplatively. “But, you know Nickie, if you ever need someone to talk to about stuff that’s bugging you, you can talk to me.”

I bristled. “Why would I want to talk to you?” I demanded irritably and irrationally. “Especially when I could talk to Mark or Eric or Alex or Danny.”

Sidney shrugged. “You could talk to them… but they all think you’re far too much fun. And you won’t spoil that image. Me, I know better.”

“Are you saying I’m not fun?” I demanded, really feeling irritable now.

“I’m not saying that at all.” Sidney said with a shrug. “But to them, that’s all you are… fun and sexy.”

“And if that’s all I am to them what the hell am I to you?” I asked. “If I cared about being something to you that is.”

“Right now?” He said, his eyes serious. “I’d love to take you down a notch or two and say that you’re just another girl. But you’re not. You’re a girl that I can’t get off my mind because I know, and don’t ask me how I know, but I just do, I know there’s a lot more to you then everyone else is seeing, and I want to know what it is.” He paused. “I want to know the secrets that are hiding behind those carelessly smiling eyes. I see them Nickie… even if no one else does.”

I couldn’t help myself. It was the sweetest thing any guy had ever said to me. I walked over to him and kissed him softly on the right cheek, my right hand on his left cheek, and I couldn’t keep from stroking it gently. However that didn’t keep me from whispering, my breath hot in his ear. “That’s sweet phenom. But some secrets are meant to be kept.”

*

I avoided Sidney for the next few days. I had to schoolwork to do after all. Plus I had stuff to think about. Mom hadn’t called back when she was sober, not that I expected her too… she’d sober up and forget all about having called in the first place. I wondered about Dad. He’d sent me the car after all, so he did actually KNOW where I was, but that didn’t mean that he had actually spent any real time thinking about me, or how I was doing. If he had, well, he probably would have at the very least, had his secretary call me.

Saturday night came along and I couldn’t avoid seeing people any longer. Michelle had called about seven times in the past few days, and she and Mark (who I couldn’t really avoid since we, like lived together) were insistent that I come to the game. To tell the truth, I was ready to get out of the house for a little while. So I went and picked Michelle up.

“Where have you been all week?” She demanded, getting in the car.

“I was catching up on schoolwork.” I said. “I was about a week behind, and I do have finals coming up next week too.”

“Eric told Danny, who told me, that you spent the night at their place.” She said, eyebrows raised.

I laughed, shaking my head. “Yeah, I got drunk and passed out on the couch.” I said. “Eric and the phenom were nice enough to let me stay there.” I glanced at her slyly. “So have you been spending time with Danny?” I asked.

Michelle shook her head. “Not really. He talks to me about you.”

“Oh.” I said, shaking my head. “What can I say? He’s a boy and he’s stupid.”

She laughed. “And he thinks you’re hot.” She said. “And he is stupid.” She added. “He doesn’t realize that he doesn’t have a chance… not with Sidney around at least.”

“The boy is devastating Mich.” I said, my expression softening. “Those eyes… and when he smiles….”

“So you’ve actually seen him smile?” She said. “I thought all you two did was argue.”

I laughed as I pulled into the parking lot. “We still managed to do a lot of that.” I said. “But I helped him with his psychology paper the afternoon after I passed out on their couch.” I explained. “And I managed to get a couple of smiles out of him.”

Michelle laughed as we got out of the car and headed into the rink. Mark had gotten us the same tickets right behind the bench again. This time, after the pre-game skate, Sidney winked at me before taking his spot on the bench. I couldn’t help but smile and give him a little wave. Michelle elbowed me in the side. “I’ll t’aime.” She whispered.

“He doesn’t love me Mich.” I said, shaking my head. “Don’t be silly.”

“He likes you then.” She replied quickly, sticking her tongue out at me.

I laughed, and Michelle and I sat back to enjoy the game. I watched, impressed this time, as Sidney scored two goals and added an assist as Rimouski defeated Victoriaville by a final score of 6 to 1. He played extremely well, and part of me felt… well almost proud of him. Not that I had any right to feel proud or anything. I mean, it wasn’t like I’d done anything to help him.

“We will stay to talk to the boys yes?” Michelle asked, eyes hopeful.

“Yeah sure.” I said with a shrug, knowing that she wanted to talk to Danny.

So we headed back towards the dressing room, this time wading through throngs of press. Anytime the phenom has a good game the press apparently has a good time. We waited, and waited, and waited. Finally, about forty-five minutes after the game ended the first of the guys started to emerge from the locker room. Danny, who’d only managed one assist, was one of the first out of the room. “Bonjour Michelle.” He said smiling, and hugging her. Then he gave me a hug. “Hey sexy. Darryl said to tell you that he’ll won’t be able to get out of there for another half-hour at least.”

“Cool.” I said, biting back the snarky comment that had bubbled to my lips. “What about Mark?” I asked looking around.

“He should be out right away.” Danny said. “But aren’t you going to wait for Darryl?”

I shrugged. “Why should I?”

Michelle looked at me slyly. “Because you are both hot for each other.” She said smirking. “You may just have some fun tonight… help Sidney relax before the next game.”

I glared at her. “Only if you’ll help….” I trailed off, raising my eyebrows at Danny briefly.

Michelle blushed again. “Fine, you don’t have to help him relax, but that doesn’t mean that you do not want to get in each others pants.”

I shook my head. It couldn’t possibly be that obvious could it? I mean, I knew that everyone knew I thought Sid was hot… New Year’s Eve had done me in there. But as for Sidney, he’d done nothing to show he wanted me… in fact, for the most part he had ignored me as much as possible. And when he wasn’t ignoring me, he was calling me a spoiled brat. “I’ll think I’m gonna go guys. Danny you want to take Michelle home for me? I need to go for a drive. I’ve got stuff to
think about.”