On Wednesday, Jordan picks me up at six and we go to an Italian place for dinner just to catch up. After we order some drinks, Jordan gets right into what I didn’t want to discuss over the phone yesterday.
“So, how’s Ryan?” he asks as he takes a sip of his water.
“Well, you just get right into things, don’t you?” I ask him as I laugh.
“Well, yesterday you said we’d talk about it tomorrow night, and its tomorrow night, so tell me about it.”
“Um, well, I broke up with him yesterday.”
“You did?” he asks me, somewhat eagerly, and that makes me wonder for a second, but I ignore it.
“Yeah, and it wasn’t the easiest of things to do. He didn’t see why I was breaking up with him.”
“Well, he’s a dumb shit if he didn’t see that one coming.”
We both laugh, and I tell him exactly what happened. We don’t really talk about hockey, since that’s a bit of a sensitive subject with Jordan right now. The only thing he asks me is if I want to come to the game tomorrow night, and of course I say yes. I love going to games and watching Jordan play, it’s so much fun (and I get to go for free).
After dinner, Jordan drives me back to my apartment, and he hangs out with us for a little while. He offers Ann a ticket for the game too, and she says yes. Helen’s going out tomorrow night with a guy she met in class, or else she’d probably come with too. Jordan heads home around eleven, and I give him a hug before he leaves. Ann and I talk for a little while longer before we head to bed, and I’m thinking about the game tomorrow night, and Jordan and how he’s playing Eric, and that I’m glad I don’t have to hear Paul Steigerwald and Bob Errey say that “the Staals are brothers” fifty times while I watch the game.
Jordan’s POV
As I drive away from Maddie’s apartment, I can’t help but think about how she broke up with Ryan and is single again. She dated a guy for awhile right when we first met, but was single all of last year. I didn’t even think about it at all before, but now I think about it a lot. Heather and I had another fight on the phone last night, and we haven’t talked to each other since. We haven’t gone that long without talking ever before, but I want to wait until tomorrow to try to call her. I tried today, twice, but she never called me back, which means she’s pissed, and I’m pissed too. I’m trying to be the bigger person; I didn’t even start our fight and I’m not the one that hung up first, but with Heather, that never matters. I’m starting to wonder how much longer I can deal with this.
I’m also starting to wonder about Maddie, especially because she’s someone I can always talk to about anything, no matter what she’s doing or what time it is. She’s one of the best friends I’ve ever had, and we’ve only been friends for a couple of years. The fact that I have feelings for her is making me think twice about my relationship with Heather. I don’t want to jeopardize our friendship, but if I don’t tell her how I feel soon, I don’t know what I’ll do. I have to sort things out with Heather first though, and see if our relationship can get past this, because I do love her. Or at least I think I still do. Shit.
Maddie’s POV
I have trouble sleeping that night, and finally just decide to get up around seven, even though I don’t have class until nine. I decide to take a shower and eat some breakfast, and get to class a little early and talk to some of my friends before it starts.
*****
I get through my three classes of the day and go back to my apartment to make lunch and do some of my homework before Ann and Helen get back.
“So, you haven’t really told us about this guy you’re going out with,” I tell Helen as we sit in our family room. “What’s he like?”
“Well,” she begins with a smile on her face, “his name is Steve, and he’s a junior too. He’s also an architecture major, and he’s about six-foot two, and well, hot.”
We laugh and ask her more about him, and then get ready for the game because Jordan’s just going to pick us up on his way there. Jordan calls me and tells me he’s on his way, so we head downstairs and wait. When he pulls up, we run outside through the rain and get into the car.
“Hey how’s it going?” he asks as we close the doors.
“Not too bad, how about you?” we ask.
“Oh, not too bad. I’m hoping I get to lay Eric out tonight.”
We laugh, and I ask him about Eric and how he’s doing, and he tells me he’s doing well, and that he wants to see me after the game. We pull up to Mellon and Jordan parks the car right next to Kris Letang, who’s just getting out of his.
“Hey Kris,” I greet him as I open my door.
“Hey Maddie,” he says back and we hug.
Ann says hi to him as well, and we head inside. The boys head to the locker room and we get our tickets and hang out in the family room for awhile before heading up to our seats.
Saturday, January 24, 2009
Chapter 5-How I Feel
I head to my three classes of the day, and when I get out, I head to where I’m meeting Ryan for lunch. This isn’t going to be easy, since he’s so nice, but it’s what I have to do.
“Hey,” he greets me as I walk up to him. He’s waiting outside, and he gives me a kiss on the cheek when I reach him. “Ready for lunch?”
I nod, and we head in and manage to get a table right away. We order drinks, and we talk about our weekends, but I leave out the whole thing about me crashing at Jordan’s. I don’t want him to think I was cheating on him, which I wasn’t, but still. Before we get our food, there’s a lull in our conversation, and we don’t talk for a couple of minutes, until I decide to speak up.
“Hey, Ryan, I wanted to meet you here for lunch today because we need to talk,” I begin.
“About what?” he asks me, reaching for my hand. I pull it away.
“About us.”
“Well, what about us?” he asks after a minute.
“Ryan, you’re a nice guy and all, but I’m sorry, I just don’t think we’re a good couple.”
“Well, I happen to think otherwise.”
“Ryan, it’s just, well…I’m sorry. I hate to sound clichéd, but it’s not you, it’s me. You’re great and all, but I just don’t really feel anything.”
He looks at me incredulously, and as the waitress puts our food down, she can tell something’s going on, so she hurries away.
“Maddie, I like you, a lot. I really do. I feel like we have something.”
I don’t really have anything to say, because I don’t know what to say. We sit there for a couple minutes in silence before he speaks up.
“Are you in love with someone else?” he asks.
I shift my eyes down towards my food and don’t say a word.
“It’s Jordan, isn’t it?” he loudly says.
I don’t say a word.
“Holy shit, it is. I knew it, I knew it.” He pounds the table with his fist a couple of times.
“Can you calm down please?” I ask. “People are looking.”
“Like I care. You’re dumping me for someone who doesn’t even know you’re in love with them!”
“Like I said, it’s not you, it’s me.” This is pissing me off.
“Yeah, no shit. So, Jordan, huh? Your best friend? Who has a girlfriend that he’s in love with?”
“You know what? I don’t have to talk to you about this. You’re being an asshole. I don’t have any feelings for you, and I never will. So, I’m sorry, goodbye.”
Ryan looks at me, shocked. I was mean, but he was being an asshole. I grab my backpack and get out of the booth. Ryan tries to get me to stay, but I just shake my head and walk out of the restaurant and walk home. That was not the way I wanted to end it, but I didn’t really have a choice.
*****
When I got home, Helen was there, so she asked me how lunch was as I flopped down on the couch.
“Oh, it was lovely,” I sarcastically tell her.
“Did you break up with him?” she asks.
“Yep. It sucked. He thought that we were a great couple and that everything was working fine, and I felt otherwise, so that was a great talk.”
“I’m sorry, that doesn’t sound like a lot of fun.”
“Yeah, it sucked, but I really didn’t have a choice. He also guessed that I’m in love with Jordan, but I didn’t confirm or deny it.”
“I mean, it’s not very obvious that you’re in love with Jordan, since you two are best friends and always hang out all the time anyway, but I mean, I can see how he guessed it.”
“Well yeah, whatever. It’s done, but it’s not like I’m totally happy, either.”
Just then, my stomach rumbles really loudly, and Helen laughs.
“Wait, I thought you got lunch with him,” she laughs.
“About that,” I begin. “We ordered lunch and as I was breaking up with him we got it, and I didn’t really have a chance to eat it.”
We both laugh, and that helps me feel a little better. She asks me if I want to go out and grab something, and I say yes, so we head out and grab some lunch.
*****
We watch the Penguins game that night, and they manage to win, 2-1, in the shootout. Jordan got a couple of penalties, but overall it was a good game. People are starting to criticize Jordan for his play though, since he’s not producing a whole lot, even though he’s doing a pretty good job. It pisses me off, since he’s my best friend, but I have to take it with a grain of salt, since everyone is entitled to their own opinions.
The next day, in between classes, I feel my phone vibrating and I look down at it: it’s Jordan.
“Hey, what’s up?” I ask.
“Oh, not too much, just heading into the rink. We have optional practice. How’s your day going so far?” he asks.
“Not too bad. I’m just in between classes right now. Nice win last night!”
“Thanks, it was a close one, I’m just glad we got the two points. No game until Thursday now, so that’s nice.”
“Is Eric coming in on Wednesday?” I ask him. They’re playing the Hurricanes on Thursday, so I wanted to see if Eric was coming in the night before.
“I actually just talked to him, and they’re not coming up until Thursday morning. It’s too bad; I wanted to catch up with him. Hey, do you have a lot of homework tonight, or do you want to meet up for dinner or something?”
“Well, I do have something due tomorrow, so can we do it tomorrow instead?”
“Sure, how about I pick you up around six? Is that okay?”
“Sounds good.”
We talk a little bit and then he decides to ask me about Ryan.
“Can we just talk about that tomorrow night?” I ask him.
“Sure, I mean, did something happen?” he asks.
“Yeah, something happened. I’d rather just talk about it in person though.”
Jordan respects that, and we talk for a little while longer before I have to go to class. I hang up the phone and walk into my classroom and talk to a few people before class starts, and I’m thinking about seeing Jordan tomorrow night the whole time.
“Hey,” he greets me as I walk up to him. He’s waiting outside, and he gives me a kiss on the cheek when I reach him. “Ready for lunch?”
I nod, and we head in and manage to get a table right away. We order drinks, and we talk about our weekends, but I leave out the whole thing about me crashing at Jordan’s. I don’t want him to think I was cheating on him, which I wasn’t, but still. Before we get our food, there’s a lull in our conversation, and we don’t talk for a couple of minutes, until I decide to speak up.
“Hey, Ryan, I wanted to meet you here for lunch today because we need to talk,” I begin.
“About what?” he asks me, reaching for my hand. I pull it away.
“About us.”
“Well, what about us?” he asks after a minute.
“Ryan, you’re a nice guy and all, but I’m sorry, I just don’t think we’re a good couple.”
“Well, I happen to think otherwise.”
“Ryan, it’s just, well…I’m sorry. I hate to sound clichéd, but it’s not you, it’s me. You’re great and all, but I just don’t really feel anything.”
He looks at me incredulously, and as the waitress puts our food down, she can tell something’s going on, so she hurries away.
“Maddie, I like you, a lot. I really do. I feel like we have something.”
I don’t really have anything to say, because I don’t know what to say. We sit there for a couple minutes in silence before he speaks up.
“Are you in love with someone else?” he asks.
I shift my eyes down towards my food and don’t say a word.
“It’s Jordan, isn’t it?” he loudly says.
I don’t say a word.
“Holy shit, it is. I knew it, I knew it.” He pounds the table with his fist a couple of times.
“Can you calm down please?” I ask. “People are looking.”
“Like I care. You’re dumping me for someone who doesn’t even know you’re in love with them!”
“Like I said, it’s not you, it’s me.” This is pissing me off.
“Yeah, no shit. So, Jordan, huh? Your best friend? Who has a girlfriend that he’s in love with?”
“You know what? I don’t have to talk to you about this. You’re being an asshole. I don’t have any feelings for you, and I never will. So, I’m sorry, goodbye.”
Ryan looks at me, shocked. I was mean, but he was being an asshole. I grab my backpack and get out of the booth. Ryan tries to get me to stay, but I just shake my head and walk out of the restaurant and walk home. That was not the way I wanted to end it, but I didn’t really have a choice.
*****
When I got home, Helen was there, so she asked me how lunch was as I flopped down on the couch.
“Oh, it was lovely,” I sarcastically tell her.
“Did you break up with him?” she asks.
“Yep. It sucked. He thought that we were a great couple and that everything was working fine, and I felt otherwise, so that was a great talk.”
“I’m sorry, that doesn’t sound like a lot of fun.”
“Yeah, it sucked, but I really didn’t have a choice. He also guessed that I’m in love with Jordan, but I didn’t confirm or deny it.”
“I mean, it’s not very obvious that you’re in love with Jordan, since you two are best friends and always hang out all the time anyway, but I mean, I can see how he guessed it.”
“Well yeah, whatever. It’s done, but it’s not like I’m totally happy, either.”
Just then, my stomach rumbles really loudly, and Helen laughs.
“Wait, I thought you got lunch with him,” she laughs.
“About that,” I begin. “We ordered lunch and as I was breaking up with him we got it, and I didn’t really have a chance to eat it.”
We both laugh, and that helps me feel a little better. She asks me if I want to go out and grab something, and I say yes, so we head out and grab some lunch.
*****
We watch the Penguins game that night, and they manage to win, 2-1, in the shootout. Jordan got a couple of penalties, but overall it was a good game. People are starting to criticize Jordan for his play though, since he’s not producing a whole lot, even though he’s doing a pretty good job. It pisses me off, since he’s my best friend, but I have to take it with a grain of salt, since everyone is entitled to their own opinions.
The next day, in between classes, I feel my phone vibrating and I look down at it: it’s Jordan.
“Hey, what’s up?” I ask.
“Oh, not too much, just heading into the rink. We have optional practice. How’s your day going so far?” he asks.
“Not too bad. I’m just in between classes right now. Nice win last night!”
“Thanks, it was a close one, I’m just glad we got the two points. No game until Thursday now, so that’s nice.”
“Is Eric coming in on Wednesday?” I ask him. They’re playing the Hurricanes on Thursday, so I wanted to see if Eric was coming in the night before.
“I actually just talked to him, and they’re not coming up until Thursday morning. It’s too bad; I wanted to catch up with him. Hey, do you have a lot of homework tonight, or do you want to meet up for dinner or something?”
“Well, I do have something due tomorrow, so can we do it tomorrow instead?”
“Sure, how about I pick you up around six? Is that okay?”
“Sounds good.”
We talk a little bit and then he decides to ask me about Ryan.
“Can we just talk about that tomorrow night?” I ask him.
“Sure, I mean, did something happen?” he asks.
“Yeah, something happened. I’d rather just talk about it in person though.”
Jordan respects that, and we talk for a little while longer before I have to go to class. I hang up the phone and walk into my classroom and talk to a few people before class starts, and I’m thinking about seeing Jordan tomorrow night the whole time.
Chapter 4-How I Feel
I wake up around ten thirty the next morning. Therrien gave the guys the day off, so they don’t have to head into the rink today, but they have to be at the airport in the late afternoon to head to Boston. Jordan’s still fast asleep, so I take a shower and then decide to make some breakfast. I know he has a bunch of food in his apartment, so I decide to scramble some eggs and make some toast. I hear some noise coming from Jordan’s room, and a minute later he comes out of his room, only wearing his boxers. Why does he keep torturing me?
“Morning,” he greets me, and I can tell his throat’s a little dry.
“How are you feeling?” I ask, laughing as I pour the eggs into the frying pan.
“I’ve felt better, but not too bad.”
I laugh and hand him some Advil from my purse and he grabs a glass of water.
“Thanks,” he says to me as he downs the Advil and water. We look right at each other for a few seconds, and I wonder what he’s thinking about. I get back to working on breakfast, and Jordan grabs the plates and silverware and puts them at the counter where there are a couple of stools. He pours the orange juice right as the eggs are done, and we sit down and eat breakfast.
“Excited about not having practice today?” I ask him.
“You have no idea,” he laughs as he eats some scrambled eggs. “Maddie, who taught you how to cook? I won’t lie, these eggs are amazing.”
“Jordan, they’re eggs,” I tell him as I laugh. “They’re not that tough.”
“They’re really good.”
“Well, thanks. I guess I’ll just take it as a compliment. Next time I make them, I’ll show you.”
“You better.”
We just chit chat for the rest of breakfast, and decide to just hang out for a couple hours before he takes me back to my apartment so he can head up to Boston for a game.
“Well, I’ll be back very late on Monday night,” he tells me as he pulls up to my building. “Do you want to grab something to eat on Tuesday or Wednesday after you’re done with class?”
“Yeah, sure,” I say, nodding my head. “Give me a call when you get back?”
“Definitely.”
I give him a hug before I leave the car, and then head inside.
“So, how’s Jordan?” Ann asks as I walk through the front door.
“Just fine,” I tell her, heading to my room to drop my purse in there. “Just fine.”
“Mmm-hmm, keep telling yourself that.”
“He is fine. I crashed on the couch last night. We just hung out for a couple of hours after we woke up, and he dropped me off on the way to the airport.”
“This has never happened to me before, obviously, but what is it like to hang out with him all the time and be like, totally in love with him?” Ann asks me as we sit down on the couch.
“I mean, he doesn’t know. And we’re best friends, so I like hanging out with him. But it can be totally shitty sometimes. Like, this morning, when I was in the kitchen, and he walked out of his room in just his boxers, I wanted to die. Well, jump him, but since I couldn’t, die.”
“He came out in his boxers?” Ann asked. “And how does that look?”
“Well, I had seen him shirtless before, like up at the lake this summer, but it’s pretty nice,” I laugh as I tell her.
We talk more about last night, what she did, and what I did. She tells me just to see how everything goes, and that I shouldn’t keep my feelings a secret forever. After our little chat, I decide to work on a paper for one of my classes that isn’t due for a couple weeks yet, but I just need to do something to take my mind off of everything.
*****
Around six o’clock, my phone starts ringing. I look at it; it’s Ryan. Oh shit.
“Hey, what’s up?” I ask him.
“Not too much, I just got back. How was the rest of your weekend?” he asks me.
“Good. I went to the game last night and partied at Diesel with the guys afterwards.”
“You have to take me with you next time!” Ryan hasn’t met any of the guys except for Jordan, and he’s a huge Pens fan, and dying to hang with the team. Too bad it’ll never happen. “Anyways, I have a bunch of stuff to do tonight, but do you want to grab lunch tomorrow? You’re done by what, one thirty?” he asks.
“Yeah, where do you want to meet?”
He suggests a place that’s right near the building my last class of the day is in, and I tell him I’ll meet him there at one thirty. When I get off the phone, I walk down the hall to Helen’s room and knock on the half-open door.
“Hey, what’s up?” she asks me.
“Hey, so I just talked to Ryan on the phone,” I begin, sitting down on her bed next to her.
“And?” she asks.
“We’re meeting for lunch tomorrow. I didn’t tell him anything was wrong, we’re just meeting to catch up. Should I do it then?”
She thinks about it for a minute, and then nods her head.
“You can’t lead him on, it’s not fair to either of you,” she says to me.
“What should I say? I’ve never really broken up with anyone before. I hate to do the old ‘It’s not you, it’s me’ cliché, but that’s kind of how it is.”
“Well, I can’t tell you exactly what to say, since I don’t know exactly how you feel, but he is a nice guy, so don’t let him down too hard.”
We talk for a little while longer, and I try to decide what to say to him tomorrow.
“Morning,” he greets me, and I can tell his throat’s a little dry.
“How are you feeling?” I ask, laughing as I pour the eggs into the frying pan.
“I’ve felt better, but not too bad.”
I laugh and hand him some Advil from my purse and he grabs a glass of water.
“Thanks,” he says to me as he downs the Advil and water. We look right at each other for a few seconds, and I wonder what he’s thinking about. I get back to working on breakfast, and Jordan grabs the plates and silverware and puts them at the counter where there are a couple of stools. He pours the orange juice right as the eggs are done, and we sit down and eat breakfast.
“Excited about not having practice today?” I ask him.
“You have no idea,” he laughs as he eats some scrambled eggs. “Maddie, who taught you how to cook? I won’t lie, these eggs are amazing.”
“Jordan, they’re eggs,” I tell him as I laugh. “They’re not that tough.”
“They’re really good.”
“Well, thanks. I guess I’ll just take it as a compliment. Next time I make them, I’ll show you.”
“You better.”
We just chit chat for the rest of breakfast, and decide to just hang out for a couple hours before he takes me back to my apartment so he can head up to Boston for a game.
“Well, I’ll be back very late on Monday night,” he tells me as he pulls up to my building. “Do you want to grab something to eat on Tuesday or Wednesday after you’re done with class?”
“Yeah, sure,” I say, nodding my head. “Give me a call when you get back?”
“Definitely.”
I give him a hug before I leave the car, and then head inside.
“So, how’s Jordan?” Ann asks as I walk through the front door.
“Just fine,” I tell her, heading to my room to drop my purse in there. “Just fine.”
“Mmm-hmm, keep telling yourself that.”
“He is fine. I crashed on the couch last night. We just hung out for a couple of hours after we woke up, and he dropped me off on the way to the airport.”
“This has never happened to me before, obviously, but what is it like to hang out with him all the time and be like, totally in love with him?” Ann asks me as we sit down on the couch.
“I mean, he doesn’t know. And we’re best friends, so I like hanging out with him. But it can be totally shitty sometimes. Like, this morning, when I was in the kitchen, and he walked out of his room in just his boxers, I wanted to die. Well, jump him, but since I couldn’t, die.”
“He came out in his boxers?” Ann asked. “And how does that look?”
“Well, I had seen him shirtless before, like up at the lake this summer, but it’s pretty nice,” I laugh as I tell her.
We talk more about last night, what she did, and what I did. She tells me just to see how everything goes, and that I shouldn’t keep my feelings a secret forever. After our little chat, I decide to work on a paper for one of my classes that isn’t due for a couple weeks yet, but I just need to do something to take my mind off of everything.
*****
Around six o’clock, my phone starts ringing. I look at it; it’s Ryan. Oh shit.
“Hey, what’s up?” I ask him.
“Not too much, I just got back. How was the rest of your weekend?” he asks me.
“Good. I went to the game last night and partied at Diesel with the guys afterwards.”
“You have to take me with you next time!” Ryan hasn’t met any of the guys except for Jordan, and he’s a huge Pens fan, and dying to hang with the team. Too bad it’ll never happen. “Anyways, I have a bunch of stuff to do tonight, but do you want to grab lunch tomorrow? You’re done by what, one thirty?” he asks.
“Yeah, where do you want to meet?”
He suggests a place that’s right near the building my last class of the day is in, and I tell him I’ll meet him there at one thirty. When I get off the phone, I walk down the hall to Helen’s room and knock on the half-open door.
“Hey, what’s up?” she asks me.
“Hey, so I just talked to Ryan on the phone,” I begin, sitting down on her bed next to her.
“And?” she asks.
“We’re meeting for lunch tomorrow. I didn’t tell him anything was wrong, we’re just meeting to catch up. Should I do it then?”
She thinks about it for a minute, and then nods her head.
“You can’t lead him on, it’s not fair to either of you,” she says to me.
“What should I say? I’ve never really broken up with anyone before. I hate to do the old ‘It’s not you, it’s me’ cliché, but that’s kind of how it is.”
“Well, I can’t tell you exactly what to say, since I don’t know exactly how you feel, but he is a nice guy, so don’t let him down too hard.”
We talk for a little while longer, and I try to decide what to say to him tomorrow.
Chapter 3-How I Feel
We stayed up for a long time talking, and I went to bed around two, and woke up around ten forty-five. I didn’t sleep very well; I definitely had way too much on my mind. I try to fall back asleep, but when I realize that isn’t going to happen I get out of bed and take a shower.
As I’m making breakfast with Ann after my shower, my phone rings. It’s Jordan.
“Hey, what’s up?” I ask him.
“Not much, just got out of morning skate,” he tells me. “I’m driving back home to take a nap.”
“Nice, I just woke up a little bit ago.”
“How was your date last night?” he asks.
“I really don’t want to talk about that over the phone. Can we talk in the car on the way to the game?”
“Sure, of course. That’s why I was calling. Can I pick you up at about four thirty? The game starts at seven.”
“Of course, sounds good, I’ll see you then.”
We talk for a couple more minutes, until Jordan gets back to the apartment he got downtown at the beginning of the season, and I tell him I’ll see him tonight. I hang up the phone and get back to making pancakes for the three of us, since Helen just woke up.
“How’s Jordan?” Ann asks with a little smirk on her face.
“Fine, just fine,” I tell them, and I get back to making pancakes. That ends that conversation.
*****
At four thirty, Jordan calls me to let me know that he’s just about here, so I say goodbye to Ann and Helen and run out the door to his car.
“Hey,” I say as I open the door and get into the passenger seat.
“Hey, what’s up?” he asks. I close the door and we start moving.
“Oh, not too much.”
“Want to tell me about that date last night?” he asks.
“I guess so.” I don’t say anything for a minute, and we’re stopped at a light.
“So, are you going to say anything?” he laughs.
“Yeah, sure I guess,” I laugh. “I mean, it was fine and all, but I don’t think there’s anything there. You know what I’m talking about?”
“I know what you’re saying,” he says.
“I mean, I thought there was something there at first, but there definitely isn’t anything there. When he kissed me, it was just nothing. I actually just wanted it to end.”
“Well that’s not good,” he laughs.
“Oh thanks,” I laugh as I jokingly hit him in the arm. “Trust me; I realize that’s not good. That’s why I plan to break it off once he gets back here, at some point this week.”
“Aren’t you a heartbreaker! That guy loves you.”
“Well, what can I say? I’m irresistible.” We both laugh and talk about other things. I ask him about Heather, and he asks me about class. We get to the arena a little before five, and I walk in with Jordan and pick up my ticket at the window inside near the entry to the locker room area. Since it’s early, I hang out in the “family room” with some of the girlfriends that have come early, like Marc-Andre’s girlfriend Veronique. We’ve become friends over the past couple of years, since I come to all of the games and hang out with everyone.
I head into the stands when the gates open, because I have a couple of friends that are coming to the game, so I meet up with them and we hang out through warm-ups, when I head to my seat.
Jordan’s POV
Damn, Maddie looked good tonight. Why is all of this happening to me now? I have a girlfriend, but now I’m attracted to my best friend. I have to concentrate on my game right now: it’s a contract year for me, and I want to stay here. I like it here. I love the guys here. I have a shot to win the Cup here. I didn’t put up the numbers I wanted to last year and I have to do well this year to prove I should stay. I need to concentrate on the game tonight.
Maddie’s POV
The Pens won 4-1 tonight, but Jordan didn’t put up any points tonight, so I know he’s going to be a little upset with himself, but happy that the team won. I wait for him, and tonight he’s out a little faster than usual. I’ve changed into a different top and shoes, to meet Diesel’s dress code, and to look like I didn’t come right from a hockey game.
“Nice game!” I tell Jordan as he walks towards me.
“Thanks,” he replies, giving me a hug.
We hang out for a few minutes until more of the guys are out and ready to head over to the club. Jordan stops and signs a few autographs before we make our way over to the South Side.
“You changed your clothes,” Jordan says after we pull out of the Mellon Arena parking lot.
“Well, I couldn’t go to Diesel in a Pens shirt and Pumas,” I laugh.
“You look nice,” he compliments me. “Sid won’t be able to keep his eyes off of you.”
“Haha, very funny. For a second there I thought you were actually giving me a compliment.”
“And who said I wasn’t? You look good.”
“Well thanks,” I say, putting my hand on his arm and shaking it. “I’m not really interested in hooking up with Sid though.”
“I know,” he laughs. “I just know it pisses you off whenever I mention it.”
Once we get to Diesel, I produce my fake ID (it’s actually my sister’s ID, we look alike), and we head up to the VIP section, and a few of the guys have beaten us here. I ate towards the end of the game in anticipation of drinking, and I only have one drink before I switch to water because I know I’m going to have to drive Jordan back to his apartment tonight. Let’s just say this isn’t the first time I’ve had to do this. He owes me a ton.
We have a ton of fun. I mainly dance with Jordan, but dance with a lot of the other guys too, mainly by dragging them out onto the floor with me. We leave Diesel around one thirty, and Jordan is definitely more than a little drunk. I drive him back to his apartment and realize I really don’t have any way of getting home, so I decide to crash at his apartment and I text Ann and Helen to let them know I won’t be coming home. He doesn’t have anything for the second bedroom yet, so after I manage to get Jordan into bed, I find a pair of his shorts and a t-shirt and put those on, grab a blanket and pillow, and crash on his couch.
As I’m making breakfast with Ann after my shower, my phone rings. It’s Jordan.
“Hey, what’s up?” I ask him.
“Not much, just got out of morning skate,” he tells me. “I’m driving back home to take a nap.”
“Nice, I just woke up a little bit ago.”
“How was your date last night?” he asks.
“I really don’t want to talk about that over the phone. Can we talk in the car on the way to the game?”
“Sure, of course. That’s why I was calling. Can I pick you up at about four thirty? The game starts at seven.”
“Of course, sounds good, I’ll see you then.”
We talk for a couple more minutes, until Jordan gets back to the apartment he got downtown at the beginning of the season, and I tell him I’ll see him tonight. I hang up the phone and get back to making pancakes for the three of us, since Helen just woke up.
“How’s Jordan?” Ann asks with a little smirk on her face.
“Fine, just fine,” I tell them, and I get back to making pancakes. That ends that conversation.
*****
At four thirty, Jordan calls me to let me know that he’s just about here, so I say goodbye to Ann and Helen and run out the door to his car.
“Hey,” I say as I open the door and get into the passenger seat.
“Hey, what’s up?” he asks. I close the door and we start moving.
“Oh, not too much.”
“Want to tell me about that date last night?” he asks.
“I guess so.” I don’t say anything for a minute, and we’re stopped at a light.
“So, are you going to say anything?” he laughs.
“Yeah, sure I guess,” I laugh. “I mean, it was fine and all, but I don’t think there’s anything there. You know what I’m talking about?”
“I know what you’re saying,” he says.
“I mean, I thought there was something there at first, but there definitely isn’t anything there. When he kissed me, it was just nothing. I actually just wanted it to end.”
“Well that’s not good,” he laughs.
“Oh thanks,” I laugh as I jokingly hit him in the arm. “Trust me; I realize that’s not good. That’s why I plan to break it off once he gets back here, at some point this week.”
“Aren’t you a heartbreaker! That guy loves you.”
“Well, what can I say? I’m irresistible.” We both laugh and talk about other things. I ask him about Heather, and he asks me about class. We get to the arena a little before five, and I walk in with Jordan and pick up my ticket at the window inside near the entry to the locker room area. Since it’s early, I hang out in the “family room” with some of the girlfriends that have come early, like Marc-Andre’s girlfriend Veronique. We’ve become friends over the past couple of years, since I come to all of the games and hang out with everyone.
I head into the stands when the gates open, because I have a couple of friends that are coming to the game, so I meet up with them and we hang out through warm-ups, when I head to my seat.
Jordan’s POV
Damn, Maddie looked good tonight. Why is all of this happening to me now? I have a girlfriend, but now I’m attracted to my best friend. I have to concentrate on my game right now: it’s a contract year for me, and I want to stay here. I like it here. I love the guys here. I have a shot to win the Cup here. I didn’t put up the numbers I wanted to last year and I have to do well this year to prove I should stay. I need to concentrate on the game tonight.
Maddie’s POV
The Pens won 4-1 tonight, but Jordan didn’t put up any points tonight, so I know he’s going to be a little upset with himself, but happy that the team won. I wait for him, and tonight he’s out a little faster than usual. I’ve changed into a different top and shoes, to meet Diesel’s dress code, and to look like I didn’t come right from a hockey game.
“Nice game!” I tell Jordan as he walks towards me.
“Thanks,” he replies, giving me a hug.
We hang out for a few minutes until more of the guys are out and ready to head over to the club. Jordan stops and signs a few autographs before we make our way over to the South Side.
“You changed your clothes,” Jordan says after we pull out of the Mellon Arena parking lot.
“Well, I couldn’t go to Diesel in a Pens shirt and Pumas,” I laugh.
“You look nice,” he compliments me. “Sid won’t be able to keep his eyes off of you.”
“Haha, very funny. For a second there I thought you were actually giving me a compliment.”
“And who said I wasn’t? You look good.”
“Well thanks,” I say, putting my hand on his arm and shaking it. “I’m not really interested in hooking up with Sid though.”
“I know,” he laughs. “I just know it pisses you off whenever I mention it.”
Once we get to Diesel, I produce my fake ID (it’s actually my sister’s ID, we look alike), and we head up to the VIP section, and a few of the guys have beaten us here. I ate towards the end of the game in anticipation of drinking, and I only have one drink before I switch to water because I know I’m going to have to drive Jordan back to his apartment tonight. Let’s just say this isn’t the first time I’ve had to do this. He owes me a ton.
We have a ton of fun. I mainly dance with Jordan, but dance with a lot of the other guys too, mainly by dragging them out onto the floor with me. We leave Diesel around one thirty, and Jordan is definitely more than a little drunk. I drive him back to his apartment and realize I really don’t have any way of getting home, so I decide to crash at his apartment and I text Ann and Helen to let them know I won’t be coming home. He doesn’t have anything for the second bedroom yet, so after I manage to get Jordan into bed, I find a pair of his shorts and a t-shirt and put those on, grab a blanket and pillow, and crash on his couch.
Chapter 2-How I Feel
I wake up on Friday morning around ten and don’t have Friday class, so I decide to do my laundry. I check my phone after I take a shower, and I see that Ryan texted me, asking me when I want to go out tonight. I tell him to come over around seven, and he tells me we’re going to head out to Robinson for dinner and a movie. Throughout the day, I do my laundry and get most of my homework out of the way before I hang out with my roommates and get ready for my date.
Ryan comes over at seven and we head out to his car and drive out to Robinson for dinner and a movie. A simple date, mainly because he has to go home to Johnstown early in the morning for a family thing. It was kind of awkward, like something just wasn’t right. We get back to my place around midnight, and he walks me up to my apartment.
“Are you okay?” he asks me. “You seem kind of distant.”
Oh shit, he realized it. “No, I’m fine. Just have a lot on my mind.”
He gives me a kiss and then he smiles at me as he leaves. Something is definitely up. When he just kissed me, I didn’t feel anything at all. When we first started dating, I thought there might be a little something there, but lately, with my feelings for Jordan getting stronger, there hasn’t been anything there. I have to talk to my roommates Helen and Ann. Thank God they decided to stay in tonight, after a big night last night.
“Hey you guys,” I say to them as I walk into the apartment, closing and locking the door behind me.
“Hey, how was your date?” Helen asks me. Ann’s in the kitchen.
“Um, okay. I really need to talk to you guys.”
“What about?” Ann asks as she walks into our family room from the kitchen.
“It’s about Ryan, and someone else,” I tell them as I sit down on the couch, sitting in between the two of them.
“Someone else?” they ask me in unison.
“Yeah, but I’m not saying who. Just help me out here.”
“Okay, sure, what’s going on?” Helen asks.
“So, don’t get me wrong, Ryan’s a great guy and everything, but tonight, when he kissed me goodbye, there was just nothing there. There never really has been anything there. He’s nice and all, but I just don’t think that we’re a good couple. I know we haven’t been dating for very long, but I just don’t think there’s anything there.”
“Well, if there’s nothing there,” Ann begins, “then it wouldn’t be fair to him to keep going out, would it?”
“No, I guess not,” I agree. “He’s such a nice guy; I don’t want to hurt him though.”
“I know what you mean, but you can’t lead him on,” Helen tells me. “Break it to him gently though. And not over the phone. Do it when he gets back from Johnstown.”
I tell them that’s a good plan, and as we sit there in silence for a couple of minutes, I think about how I’m going to break up with him.
“Wait!” Helen says kind of loud. “You said you like someone else! Tell us!”
“Shit, I can’t believe I almost forgot to ask you about that,” Ann says. “Tell us!”
I sigh and then decide to give them hints as to who it could be.
“Well,” I begin, “we’ve been friends for awhile now; we’re pretty much best friends. He’s a good guy: funny, polite, hot, the total package. Over the summer, my feelings for him changed. We were just best friends, but when we hung out this summer, it was like my feelings for him changed overnight.”
I pause, making sure they’ve gotten everything I’ve said so far. They nod and tell me to keep going.
“I have no idea if he feels the same way about me though. He has a girlfriend, and I can tell he’s really happy with her. I don’t want to risk our friendship by telling him how I feel though. He’s such a good friend; I don’t want to lose him.”
We sit there for a minute as they digest everything I’ve just said, and they think about it.
“Well,” Helen begins, breaking the silence, “it sounds like you like the guy, and that you are such good friends with him that you don’t want to risk it. You sound like you have it bad though.”
“I do,” I tell her as I nod my head in agreement. “He’s great.”
As Helen and I talk, I notice Ann isn’t saying anything; it just looks like she’s thinking. Then, as Helen and I are talking, she squeals and I jump out of my seat, shocked by her squealing.
“Oh my God!” she screams. “It’s Jordan! You’re in love with Jordan!!”
Helen squeals too as she puts the pieces together. They start asking me a million questions at once.
“You guys!” I yell. “Calm down!”
“Well, are we right?” Ann asks after they calm down.
I put my head in my hands and mumble, “Yes.”
“I knew this would happen!” Ann says excitedly. “I knew it.”
“Maddie, what are you going to do?” Helen asks.
“I have no fucking clue,” I tell her. “Not a clue. I refuse to risk our friendship by telling him how I feel.”
“I don’t blame you. But you can’t go on like this forever either.” Ann puts her hand on my arm to comfort me.
“So, this has been going on since you visited him in July?” Helen asks me.
“Yeah,” I reply.
“You’ve been in total agony for three months? Why the hell didn’t you tell us?” she asks.
“I just couldn’t, I’m sorry. But I haven’t told anyone yet; I’ve only told you guys. I’m dead serious. So do not tell a soul, okay?”
“Wait. You didn’t even tell your sister?” Helen asks incredulously. My sister Amy and I are really tight. She’s twenty-three and she works for the Pitt athletic department. We’ve always been really close and we tell each other everything. But I didn’t even tell her this.
“Nope. Not a soul. So don’t say a word!” I tell them, trying to stress my point.
“I promise,” they reply together.
Ryan comes over at seven and we head out to his car and drive out to Robinson for dinner and a movie. A simple date, mainly because he has to go home to Johnstown early in the morning for a family thing. It was kind of awkward, like something just wasn’t right. We get back to my place around midnight, and he walks me up to my apartment.
“Are you okay?” he asks me. “You seem kind of distant.”
Oh shit, he realized it. “No, I’m fine. Just have a lot on my mind.”
He gives me a kiss and then he smiles at me as he leaves. Something is definitely up. When he just kissed me, I didn’t feel anything at all. When we first started dating, I thought there might be a little something there, but lately, with my feelings for Jordan getting stronger, there hasn’t been anything there. I have to talk to my roommates Helen and Ann. Thank God they decided to stay in tonight, after a big night last night.
“Hey you guys,” I say to them as I walk into the apartment, closing and locking the door behind me.
“Hey, how was your date?” Helen asks me. Ann’s in the kitchen.
“Um, okay. I really need to talk to you guys.”
“What about?” Ann asks as she walks into our family room from the kitchen.
“It’s about Ryan, and someone else,” I tell them as I sit down on the couch, sitting in between the two of them.
“Someone else?” they ask me in unison.
“Yeah, but I’m not saying who. Just help me out here.”
“Okay, sure, what’s going on?” Helen asks.
“So, don’t get me wrong, Ryan’s a great guy and everything, but tonight, when he kissed me goodbye, there was just nothing there. There never really has been anything there. He’s nice and all, but I just don’t think that we’re a good couple. I know we haven’t been dating for very long, but I just don’t think there’s anything there.”
“Well, if there’s nothing there,” Ann begins, “then it wouldn’t be fair to him to keep going out, would it?”
“No, I guess not,” I agree. “He’s such a nice guy; I don’t want to hurt him though.”
“I know what you mean, but you can’t lead him on,” Helen tells me. “Break it to him gently though. And not over the phone. Do it when he gets back from Johnstown.”
I tell them that’s a good plan, and as we sit there in silence for a couple of minutes, I think about how I’m going to break up with him.
“Wait!” Helen says kind of loud. “You said you like someone else! Tell us!”
“Shit, I can’t believe I almost forgot to ask you about that,” Ann says. “Tell us!”
I sigh and then decide to give them hints as to who it could be.
“Well,” I begin, “we’ve been friends for awhile now; we’re pretty much best friends. He’s a good guy: funny, polite, hot, the total package. Over the summer, my feelings for him changed. We were just best friends, but when we hung out this summer, it was like my feelings for him changed overnight.”
I pause, making sure they’ve gotten everything I’ve said so far. They nod and tell me to keep going.
“I have no idea if he feels the same way about me though. He has a girlfriend, and I can tell he’s really happy with her. I don’t want to risk our friendship by telling him how I feel though. He’s such a good friend; I don’t want to lose him.”
We sit there for a minute as they digest everything I’ve just said, and they think about it.
“Well,” Helen begins, breaking the silence, “it sounds like you like the guy, and that you are such good friends with him that you don’t want to risk it. You sound like you have it bad though.”
“I do,” I tell her as I nod my head in agreement. “He’s great.”
As Helen and I talk, I notice Ann isn’t saying anything; it just looks like she’s thinking. Then, as Helen and I are talking, she squeals and I jump out of my seat, shocked by her squealing.
“Oh my God!” she screams. “It’s Jordan! You’re in love with Jordan!!”
Helen squeals too as she puts the pieces together. They start asking me a million questions at once.
“You guys!” I yell. “Calm down!”
“Well, are we right?” Ann asks after they calm down.
I put my head in my hands and mumble, “Yes.”
“I knew this would happen!” Ann says excitedly. “I knew it.”
“Maddie, what are you going to do?” Helen asks.
“I have no fucking clue,” I tell her. “Not a clue. I refuse to risk our friendship by telling him how I feel.”
“I don’t blame you. But you can’t go on like this forever either.” Ann puts her hand on my arm to comfort me.
“So, this has been going on since you visited him in July?” Helen asks me.
“Yeah,” I reply.
“You’ve been in total agony for three months? Why the hell didn’t you tell us?” she asks.
“I just couldn’t, I’m sorry. But I haven’t told anyone yet; I’ve only told you guys. I’m dead serious. So do not tell a soul, okay?”
“Wait. You didn’t even tell your sister?” Helen asks incredulously. My sister Amy and I are really tight. She’s twenty-three and she works for the Pitt athletic department. We’ve always been really close and we tell each other everything. But I didn’t even tell her this.
“Nope. Not a soul. So don’t say a word!” I tell them, trying to stress my point.
“I promise,” they reply together.
Chapter 1-How I Feel
It was a Thursday night and the Penguins had a home game, which meant I was going to be going to cheer Jordan on. Heather was here last weekend for the opener, and even though we hung out a lot (we get along really well), every time I saw her I felt guilty about my feelings for Jordan. It just eats away at me every time, because that’s her boyfriend down there on the ice right now. Jordan looks up at me and winks, taking me out of my thoughts and into the arena. I wink back at him and he smiles, and I smile back. Damn it all, I think to myself. He’s with Heather. He’s not in love with you. You need to stop it NOW.
Part of me wonders what Jordan’s thinking about right now. Obviously, he’s thinking about the game and what he has to do to beat the Capitals.
Jordan’s Point of View
I saw Maddie up in the stands, in the seat where she always sits to cheer me on. She comes to every single one of my games, and she is one of my best friends. I try to concentrate on warm-ups, but I can’t. There’s something that’s different now, and I can’t put my finger on it. We’re friends and I have a great girlfriend, but has something changed? When Maddie came up to visit me towards the end of July, it seemed like something changed. I noticed the little things, like how good she looked in her bikini and how great she was. I know I need to stop thinking like this, because I have a girlfriend, but I just can’t. Heather and I haven’t been seeing eye-to-eye on a lot of things lately, and to be honest, I’m not sure what to do about that, or what I should do about Maddie. I don’t want to do or say anything that could ruin our friendship, because Maddie is one of the best friends I have ever had. And she’s dating that guy Ryan now. He seems like a good guy, but since Maddie and I are such good friends, I’m really protective, and I don’t really trust the guy. But, Maddie seems to like him, so I’ll give him a chance.
*****
Back to Maddie
The Penguins lose, 4-3, and I make my way down to the locker room to see Jordan. I have to wait for awhile, but he finally comes out, looking a little upset.
“Hey,” I say to him as he walks towards me. I give him a hug, since he looks like he needs it.
“Hey,” he says back as he returns the hug, and it lasts for a few seconds. After our hug, he tells me, “Thanks. I needed that.”
“No problem,” I laugh. “You played a good game though.”
“It was okay. I mean, obviously it could have been a lot better.”
“Shit happens. You’ll win the next one.”
We stand there in silence for a few seconds, and then Jordan breaks it.
“So, want to go get something to eat?” he asks me. “I’m starving.”
“Sure, I’m hungry too.”
We walk out to Jordan’s car (one of my friends dropped me off at the arena on her way to her internship, so I’m riding with Jordan), and on our way out, he stops and signs a few autographs and then we head to find food. It’s late, but we go to one of our usual places, and we’re there past midnight. We’re the last people to leave the place, and Jordan gives me a ride back to my apartment in Oakland, right near the Pitt campus.
“So, you coming on Saturday night?” he asks me, referring to the game against the Maple Leafs.
“Of course!” I reply. “What else do I have to do?”
“Well, you have that boyfriend of yours,” he tells me, laughing.
“He’s not really my boyfriend yet! Besides, he has some family thing on Saturday. He asked me if I wanted to go, and I said no. It’s way too soon for that shit. So we’re going out tomorrow night. Besides, I wouldn’t miss one of my best friend’s games!” I elbow him in the arm.
“Good. Cause we’re going out afterwards and I know how much you love hanging out with us. Especially Sid.”
Jordan always jokes that I am in love with Sidney Crosby, which, I am most certainly not. He’s a good guy and we’re friends, but that’s about it.
“How many times do I have to tell you that I’m not in love with Sid? That’s just weird,” I tell him, laughing.
“I know, I just love to give you shit about it. So, want me to just pick you up on Saturday? Then you don’t have to drive.”
“Sure, sounds good. Give me a call.”
“Great, see you on Saturday then.”
I give Jordan a hug, say goodbye, and head into my apartment. Since it’s Thursday and a huge party night, my roommates aren’t home, and I really don’t feel like finding out where they are, I just head to bed, but I don’t fall asleep for awhile. I’m thinking about Jordan, and Ryan then pops into my thoughts too. Damn it, I am screwed.
Part of me wonders what Jordan’s thinking about right now. Obviously, he’s thinking about the game and what he has to do to beat the Capitals.
Jordan’s Point of View
I saw Maddie up in the stands, in the seat where she always sits to cheer me on. She comes to every single one of my games, and she is one of my best friends. I try to concentrate on warm-ups, but I can’t. There’s something that’s different now, and I can’t put my finger on it. We’re friends and I have a great girlfriend, but has something changed? When Maddie came up to visit me towards the end of July, it seemed like something changed. I noticed the little things, like how good she looked in her bikini and how great she was. I know I need to stop thinking like this, because I have a girlfriend, but I just can’t. Heather and I haven’t been seeing eye-to-eye on a lot of things lately, and to be honest, I’m not sure what to do about that, or what I should do about Maddie. I don’t want to do or say anything that could ruin our friendship, because Maddie is one of the best friends I have ever had. And she’s dating that guy Ryan now. He seems like a good guy, but since Maddie and I are such good friends, I’m really protective, and I don’t really trust the guy. But, Maddie seems to like him, so I’ll give him a chance.
*****
Back to Maddie
The Penguins lose, 4-3, and I make my way down to the locker room to see Jordan. I have to wait for awhile, but he finally comes out, looking a little upset.
“Hey,” I say to him as he walks towards me. I give him a hug, since he looks like he needs it.
“Hey,” he says back as he returns the hug, and it lasts for a few seconds. After our hug, he tells me, “Thanks. I needed that.”
“No problem,” I laugh. “You played a good game though.”
“It was okay. I mean, obviously it could have been a lot better.”
“Shit happens. You’ll win the next one.”
We stand there in silence for a few seconds, and then Jordan breaks it.
“So, want to go get something to eat?” he asks me. “I’m starving.”
“Sure, I’m hungry too.”
We walk out to Jordan’s car (one of my friends dropped me off at the arena on her way to her internship, so I’m riding with Jordan), and on our way out, he stops and signs a few autographs and then we head to find food. It’s late, but we go to one of our usual places, and we’re there past midnight. We’re the last people to leave the place, and Jordan gives me a ride back to my apartment in Oakland, right near the Pitt campus.
“So, you coming on Saturday night?” he asks me, referring to the game against the Maple Leafs.
“Of course!” I reply. “What else do I have to do?”
“Well, you have that boyfriend of yours,” he tells me, laughing.
“He’s not really my boyfriend yet! Besides, he has some family thing on Saturday. He asked me if I wanted to go, and I said no. It’s way too soon for that shit. So we’re going out tomorrow night. Besides, I wouldn’t miss one of my best friend’s games!” I elbow him in the arm.
“Good. Cause we’re going out afterwards and I know how much you love hanging out with us. Especially Sid.”
Jordan always jokes that I am in love with Sidney Crosby, which, I am most certainly not. He’s a good guy and we’re friends, but that’s about it.
“How many times do I have to tell you that I’m not in love with Sid? That’s just weird,” I tell him, laughing.
“I know, I just love to give you shit about it. So, want me to just pick you up on Saturday? Then you don’t have to drive.”
“Sure, sounds good. Give me a call.”
“Great, see you on Saturday then.”
I give Jordan a hug, say goodbye, and head into my apartment. Since it’s Thursday and a huge party night, my roommates aren’t home, and I really don’t feel like finding out where they are, I just head to bed, but I don’t fall asleep for awhile. I’m thinking about Jordan, and Ryan then pops into my thoughts too. Damn it, I am screwed.
Prologue- How I Feel
My name is Madilyn Reilly (but I go by Maddie), and I was a freshman in college the first time I met one of my best friends, Jordan Staal. I had just turned eighteen, and he had just moved in next door to my parents’ house. He had just moved in with the Recchis, and my parents decided to have all of them over for dinner one night when they didn’t have a game, so I came home from the University of Pittsburgh (where I’m studying public relations and journalism) for the weekend and that’s when I met Jordan. I thought he was cute, but I didn’t fall in love with him or anything. We became friends right away and started to hang out all the time, since he didn’t really know anyone in Pittsburgh besides the guys on the team. We’re best friends now, and Jordan has been dating someone for a couple of years now, a girl from Thunder Bay named Heather.
This past summer, before my junior year, and Jordan’s third NHL season, I went up to visit Jordan in Thunder Bay, and Heather was gone. When I got up there, I hadn’t seen Jordan for about a month and a half; when I saw him, it was like everything had changed. I looked at him and was attracted to him. I truly noticed how good-looking he was (just like my friends had been telling me all along), how great his body was when we went swimming out at his brother’s place, just everything. Of course, I couldn’t tell Jordan any of this: he was in love with Heather. So, for the past couple of months, I haven’t told a soul how I feel. Not my sister, not my best friends Ann and Helen, no one. Even though I think I’m in love with Jordan, I have started to date someone, kind of to keep my mind off of Jordan. His name is Ryan Jackson, and he really is a good guy. We’ve been going out for about a month now, and he’s nice, but I’m not sure how I feel about him, and I really don’t want to lead him on at all, so I’m starting to consider breaking up with him, since I don’t really have any feelings towards him.
It’s the middle of October now, about three months after I realized my true feelings for Jordan, and about a month after I started dating Ryan. I go to all of Jordan’s games and we hang out all the time, and I haven’t let my feelings affect our friendship at all. I’m pretty sure he doesn’t have any idea that I like him in that way. He’s too in love with Heather to notice.
This past summer, before my junior year, and Jordan’s third NHL season, I went up to visit Jordan in Thunder Bay, and Heather was gone. When I got up there, I hadn’t seen Jordan for about a month and a half; when I saw him, it was like everything had changed. I looked at him and was attracted to him. I truly noticed how good-looking he was (just like my friends had been telling me all along), how great his body was when we went swimming out at his brother’s place, just everything. Of course, I couldn’t tell Jordan any of this: he was in love with Heather. So, for the past couple of months, I haven’t told a soul how I feel. Not my sister, not my best friends Ann and Helen, no one. Even though I think I’m in love with Jordan, I have started to date someone, kind of to keep my mind off of Jordan. His name is Ryan Jackson, and he really is a good guy. We’ve been going out for about a month now, and he’s nice, but I’m not sure how I feel about him, and I really don’t want to lead him on at all, so I’m starting to consider breaking up with him, since I don’t really have any feelings towards him.
It’s the middle of October now, about three months after I realized my true feelings for Jordan, and about a month after I started dating Ryan. I go to all of Jordan’s games and we hang out all the time, and I haven’t let my feelings affect our friendship at all. I’m pretty sure he doesn’t have any idea that I like him in that way. He’s too in love with Heather to notice.
Saturday, November 29, 2008
That's the Way I loved You
Sorry I've been slacking lately my muse has all but disappeared recently.
Inspired by Taylor Swift's The Way I loved You and MR. Kris Letang
He is Sensible and so incredible
“Come on, let’s go out the back way.” This statement came from my boyfriend Alex. We had been dating for a month and a half. “I don’t want to have to share you with anyone.” He is incredible; every part of him makes me forget that he’s a Pittsburgh Penguin. Yes my boyfriend was none other than Penguin’s defensemen Alex Goligoski.
And all my single friends are jealous
“You are so lucky!” My best friends from high school were fawning over my birthday present from Alex. He had gotten me a stunning diamond necklace in the shape of the penguin’s logo. He had taken me to dinner at the most expensive restaurant in town and as I told my story I could see my friends melt.
He says everything I need to hear and it’s like
I couldn’t ask for anything better
He pulled me closer as I silently sobbed on his shoulder. My grandma who had been my best friend my entire life had passed away this morning. “Shh…” He whispered softly into my hair. He gently rocked me back and forth until I settled into a light sleep. When I awoke I was greeted by a note that read…This is what it is to be loved and to know that the promise was when everything fell we’d be held. Sitting next to his note was the doll that my grandma gave me when I was an infant. I could’ve sworn I had lost it.
He opens up my door and I get into his car
After a 5-2 win against the Buffalo Sabers I headed down to the locker room to meet Alex. More than a hour later he was finally showered and ready so we left to go clubbing with some of the team. As we got to the lot he gently guided me into his side and pulled open my door before helping me into his brand new SUV.
And he says you look beautiful tonight
And I feel perfectly fine
The Christmas Ball was tonight and Alex was picking me up in about an hour. I was rushing around trying to finish my hair and makeup. I still had to put on my dress and heels and I was running out of time. I heard him place his key into the lock and open the door just as I slipped into my teal, v-neck, sparkly dress. I turned around to see him staring mouth gaping wide. “You look…so…so…beautiful.” His words just made me feel like I could fly.
But I miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain
And it’s 2am and I’m cursing your name
You’re so in love that you act insane
And that’s the way I loved you
Breakin’ down and coming undone
It’s a roller coaster kinda rush
And I never knew I could feel that much
And that’s the way I loved you
“You’re lying to me, don’t even try to tell me you aren’t.” He sighed and looked down at me with those brown eyes. Those eyes are what cause all this trouble. No matter what he does, those eyes always draw me back to him. I was beyond whatever effect they may have had on me now. Storming out I slammed the door behind me. Running out into the pouring rain the tears began to fall. When I couldn’t run anymore I collapsed to the ground and held my knees close to my chest.
“Madison,” he yelled. I heard his splashes as he caught glance of me and ran my way. He pulled me to my feet and held me close.
“Kris I just can’t do this anymore.” Those were the words that ended the best thing I ever had.
He respects my space
“Alex…please… I just want to be alone.” I was confused. I was sad. Thinking of my time with Kris only made me miss him more. This drove me insane because I know that what we had is over.
“Ok, I’ll be back in a bit, I’m going to go grab some of your favorite ice cream .” He kissed my forehead, grabbed his coat, and left me to my thoughts.
And never makes me wait
And he calls exactly when he says he will
I was getting out of the shower when I heard the phone ring. Throwing on my robe I walked to my bedroom.
“Hello…”
“Hey Mads it’s me.” I wasn’t sure at first who “me” was but I quickly realized that it was Alex. “Hey I’m sorry to call this soon but I promised you I’d call after the game.” I had completely forgotten that the game was at 1pm. “We’ll be home in a cople hours be ready to go out to dinner?”
“Sure, I love you Alex.”
“Love you too.”
He’s close to my mother
Talks business with my father
“He’s such a nice boy,” my mother commented as he and dad did the dishes from dinner. “He’s so much better than that Kris boy.” Of course my mother had to bring up Kris. She could not stand that I dated him. She saw him as a “bad boy” and didn’t like the fact that he played hockey. Why Alex was different I had yet to find out.
He’s charming and endearing
And I’m comfortable
As we sat on a blanket on the floor beside the fire I was completely happy. Alex’s body is warm and makes a perfect pillow. The only lights in the room were candles in various places and the fire. He looked down at me and gave me that sweet smirk of his. He kissed my forehead and I felt safe.
But I miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain
And it’s 2am and I’m cursing your name
You’re so in love that you act insane
And that’s the way I loved you
Breakin’ down and coming undone
It’s a roller coaster kinda rush
And I never knew I could feel that much
And that’s the way I loved you
Watching the highlights from tonight’s game had me completely in tears. Kris had just called me. From the noise and the fact that they had won I knew they were out celebrating. I can’t believe that Kris would call me when he was drunk. The worst part is that I could hear some dumb puck bunny talking in his ear. I immediately hung up and curled into a ball on the couch. How could he do this to me? He said he loved me. Normally our relationship is good but lately it’s only gotten worse and worse. I knew that I had to confront him about it.
He can’t see the smile I’m faking
And my heart’s not breaking
Cause I’m not feeling anything at all
And you were wild and crazy
Just so frustrating intoxicating
Complicated, got away by some mistake and now.
“Go…” Alex hugged me and gently led me to the door. He handed me my bag. “I know you’re not happy and that’s all I really want for you.” Crying I leaned up and kissed him on the cheek. “If Kris is the one that makes you happy then that’s all that really matters.” I didn’t know how to express what I was really feeling.
“I’m sorry …” seemed like the best option.
“I know princess, I know. Go…get out of here.” He cracked a smile and I felt myself laugh for the first time in weeks. I was going to be with Kris but only if he takes me back.
I miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain
It’s 2am and I’m cursing your name
I’m so in love that I acted insane
And that’s the way I loved you
Breaking down and coming undone
It’s a roller coaster kinda rush
And I never knew I could feel that much
And that’s the way I loved you oh, oh
Now completely drenched from the rain I stood at Kris’s door waiting for the courage to knock. After a few minutes as I reached up to rap on the door it opened revealing a half-dressed Kris Letang. He looked down at me sleepily and confused. I wrapped my arms around him and pulled his lips to meet mine. As he stood there shocked I pressed a post-it note to his chest and walked into the apartment. It felt so good to be home.
And that’s the way I loved you oh, oh
Never knew I could feel that much
And that’s the way I loved you.
Inspired by Taylor Swift's The Way I loved You and MR. Kris Letang
He is Sensible and so incredible
“Come on, let’s go out the back way.” This statement came from my boyfriend Alex. We had been dating for a month and a half. “I don’t want to have to share you with anyone.” He is incredible; every part of him makes me forget that he’s a Pittsburgh Penguin. Yes my boyfriend was none other than Penguin’s defensemen Alex Goligoski.
And all my single friends are jealous
“You are so lucky!” My best friends from high school were fawning over my birthday present from Alex. He had gotten me a stunning diamond necklace in the shape of the penguin’s logo. He had taken me to dinner at the most expensive restaurant in town and as I told my story I could see my friends melt.
He says everything I need to hear and it’s like
I couldn’t ask for anything better
He pulled me closer as I silently sobbed on his shoulder. My grandma who had been my best friend my entire life had passed away this morning. “Shh…” He whispered softly into my hair. He gently rocked me back and forth until I settled into a light sleep. When I awoke I was greeted by a note that read…This is what it is to be loved and to know that the promise was when everything fell we’d be held. Sitting next to his note was the doll that my grandma gave me when I was an infant. I could’ve sworn I had lost it.
He opens up my door and I get into his car
After a 5-2 win against the Buffalo Sabers I headed down to the locker room to meet Alex. More than a hour later he was finally showered and ready so we left to go clubbing with some of the team. As we got to the lot he gently guided me into his side and pulled open my door before helping me into his brand new SUV.
And he says you look beautiful tonight
And I feel perfectly fine
The Christmas Ball was tonight and Alex was picking me up in about an hour. I was rushing around trying to finish my hair and makeup. I still had to put on my dress and heels and I was running out of time. I heard him place his key into the lock and open the door just as I slipped into my teal, v-neck, sparkly dress. I turned around to see him staring mouth gaping wide. “You look…so…so…beautiful.” His words just made me feel like I could fly.
But I miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain
And it’s 2am and I’m cursing your name
You’re so in love that you act insane
And that’s the way I loved you
Breakin’ down and coming undone
It’s a roller coaster kinda rush
And I never knew I could feel that much
And that’s the way I loved you
“You’re lying to me, don’t even try to tell me you aren’t.” He sighed and looked down at me with those brown eyes. Those eyes are what cause all this trouble. No matter what he does, those eyes always draw me back to him. I was beyond whatever effect they may have had on me now. Storming out I slammed the door behind me. Running out into the pouring rain the tears began to fall. When I couldn’t run anymore I collapsed to the ground and held my knees close to my chest.
“Madison,” he yelled. I heard his splashes as he caught glance of me and ran my way. He pulled me to my feet and held me close.
“Kris I just can’t do this anymore.” Those were the words that ended the best thing I ever had.
He respects my space
“Alex…please… I just want to be alone.” I was confused. I was sad. Thinking of my time with Kris only made me miss him more. This drove me insane because I know that what we had is over.
“Ok, I’ll be back in a bit, I’m going to go grab some of your favorite ice cream .” He kissed my forehead, grabbed his coat, and left me to my thoughts.
And never makes me wait
And he calls exactly when he says he will
I was getting out of the shower when I heard the phone ring. Throwing on my robe I walked to my bedroom.
“Hello…”
“Hey Mads it’s me.” I wasn’t sure at first who “me” was but I quickly realized that it was Alex. “Hey I’m sorry to call this soon but I promised you I’d call after the game.” I had completely forgotten that the game was at 1pm. “We’ll be home in a cople hours be ready to go out to dinner?”
“Sure, I love you Alex.”
“Love you too.”
He’s close to my mother
Talks business with my father
“He’s such a nice boy,” my mother commented as he and dad did the dishes from dinner. “He’s so much better than that Kris boy.” Of course my mother had to bring up Kris. She could not stand that I dated him. She saw him as a “bad boy” and didn’t like the fact that he played hockey. Why Alex was different I had yet to find out.
He’s charming and endearing
And I’m comfortable
As we sat on a blanket on the floor beside the fire I was completely happy. Alex’s body is warm and makes a perfect pillow. The only lights in the room were candles in various places and the fire. He looked down at me and gave me that sweet smirk of his. He kissed my forehead and I felt safe.
But I miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain
And it’s 2am and I’m cursing your name
You’re so in love that you act insane
And that’s the way I loved you
Breakin’ down and coming undone
It’s a roller coaster kinda rush
And I never knew I could feel that much
And that’s the way I loved you
Watching the highlights from tonight’s game had me completely in tears. Kris had just called me. From the noise and the fact that they had won I knew they were out celebrating. I can’t believe that Kris would call me when he was drunk. The worst part is that I could hear some dumb puck bunny talking in his ear. I immediately hung up and curled into a ball on the couch. How could he do this to me? He said he loved me. Normally our relationship is good but lately it’s only gotten worse and worse. I knew that I had to confront him about it.
He can’t see the smile I’m faking
And my heart’s not breaking
Cause I’m not feeling anything at all
And you were wild and crazy
Just so frustrating intoxicating
Complicated, got away by some mistake and now.
“Go…” Alex hugged me and gently led me to the door. He handed me my bag. “I know you’re not happy and that’s all I really want for you.” Crying I leaned up and kissed him on the cheek. “If Kris is the one that makes you happy then that’s all that really matters.” I didn’t know how to express what I was really feeling.
“I’m sorry …” seemed like the best option.
“I know princess, I know. Go…get out of here.” He cracked a smile and I felt myself laugh for the first time in weeks. I was going to be with Kris but only if he takes me back.
I miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain
It’s 2am and I’m cursing your name
I’m so in love that I acted insane
And that’s the way I loved you
Breaking down and coming undone
It’s a roller coaster kinda rush
And I never knew I could feel that much
And that’s the way I loved you oh, oh
Now completely drenched from the rain I stood at Kris’s door waiting for the courage to knock. After a few minutes as I reached up to rap on the door it opened revealing a half-dressed Kris Letang. He looked down at me sleepily and confused. I wrapped my arms around him and pulled his lips to meet mine. As he stood there shocked I pressed a post-it note to his chest and walked into the apartment. It felt so good to be home.
And that’s the way I loved you oh, oh
Never knew I could feel that much
And that’s the way I loved you.
Thursday, August 7, 2008
What would I do without You
She was THAT girl. The girl that was what most people considered a brainic. The Girl that everyone knew but no-one was best friends with. Yeah they talked to her but they didn’t know her. She’s not athletic or out-going and no one invites her to just ‘hang-out’. Everyone assumes that she’s happy; that they know her just by having class with her. Everyone except me that is. I know there’s more to her than that. That just because she’s not athletic doesn’t mean she’s not into sports. Trust me, she is; especially when it comes to hockey. Though she may be a brainic she doesn’t act like she knows everything, actually she acts the exact opposite. Just by watching her I’ve learned so much. She writes…poetry, stories, and all sorts of other things. She’s kind, she’ll go out of her way to help you. She’s great with kids. She actually cares about those around her even if they don’t deserve it.
She was my friend. She was always there for me. She was there to cheer me on when I was on the ice. She was there to let me cry when we lost the championship game. She was there when I needed to yell because my girlfriend cheated on me. She was even there when I got my driver’s license and was ready to hit the road. She was there for anything that meant anything to me. I only wish I could say the same.
I wasn’t there for her when she needed me the most. I got her call when she was in the hospital, but I was with my latest fling and decided it wasn’t important. I was wrong, so wrong. The next day I stopped by the house to apologize; only no-one was there. So I tried calling. No one answered. She was gone. They moved I was told.
After awhile I realized, I missed her. I missed her smile. I missed her laugh. I missed her brains. I missed her support. Then I realized what I missed the most was her smell and her touch. Oh, God I’ve fallen for her. Fallen for everything she is. So I searched, and searched, and searched to no avail. I couldn’t eat, I couldn’t sleep, and my grades started slipping. I just didn’t care. The only thing in my life that didn’t change was hockey. It almost felt like she was pushing me to my best but I know that sounds crazy. My life became a routine that just crept by day by day.
Eventually my life became semi-normal again. I still sought out anything to remind me of her. This drive to find some connection led me online. There I stumbled across a creative writing site where I found a poem that hit home.
Friendship is a thing,
that causes a smile but yet can also hurt you.
Feeling some connection with this author, I went to their profile to read more. There was one entitled ‘My Pain’ so I clicked on it.
Rape-violation knowing that you’ll always feel inferior.
Abuse-knowing someone has complete control over you .
Yet neither of these is as bad as knowing your best isn’t there for you.
I was in shock. I hit the back button in order to read the author’s bio.
Hi, my name is Rachel, but my best friend used to call me Ray…please don’t ask about it. I am 17 and I’m addicted to hockey. Especially the Sudbury Wolves. I currently live in a suburb just east of Sudbury itself. No it can’t be…that has to be her. Oh God, she was raped! I knew I didn’t like him for a reason. I have to find her. At that moment I grabbed my coat and car keys and left my apartment driving east. There is only one suburb east of the city. My best guess is to check there first. As soon as I got close I stopped at a phone booth and grabbed the phone book…ah ha 1542 South St. I hopped back in my car and sped off. 1536…1538…1540…1542. I parked and got out eying the house as I walked up the drive. What the heck…I’ll never know if I don’t knock. I slipped onto the front step and knocked twice quietly. Then again a little louder. After 30 seconds I heard footsteps as the door gently opened. As it did it revealed Ray. The girl I’ve fallen in love with. “I’m so so sorry,” I whispered. “Can you forgive me for being an idiot?” She looked like she was about to cry. She grabbed my hand and led me into the entry and out of the cold. I gently eyed her appearance that I hadn’t seen in nearly 6 ½ months. Wow. She looked different. Her hair was longer and she looked tired. Her chest had grown and her stomach had slightly swollen. She glanced at me carefully as if worried about what I thought. I opened my arms and pulled her to me. I whispered comforting words in her ear. “Ray, I couldn’t care less if you’re pregnant, I love you.” She simply replied ‘oh Marc what would I do without you.’
She was my friend. She was always there for me. She was there to cheer me on when I was on the ice. She was there to let me cry when we lost the championship game. She was there when I needed to yell because my girlfriend cheated on me. She was even there when I got my driver’s license and was ready to hit the road. She was there for anything that meant anything to me. I only wish I could say the same.
I wasn’t there for her when she needed me the most. I got her call when she was in the hospital, but I was with my latest fling and decided it wasn’t important. I was wrong, so wrong. The next day I stopped by the house to apologize; only no-one was there. So I tried calling. No one answered. She was gone. They moved I was told.
After awhile I realized, I missed her. I missed her smile. I missed her laugh. I missed her brains. I missed her support. Then I realized what I missed the most was her smell and her touch. Oh, God I’ve fallen for her. Fallen for everything she is. So I searched, and searched, and searched to no avail. I couldn’t eat, I couldn’t sleep, and my grades started slipping. I just didn’t care. The only thing in my life that didn’t change was hockey. It almost felt like she was pushing me to my best but I know that sounds crazy. My life became a routine that just crept by day by day.
Eventually my life became semi-normal again. I still sought out anything to remind me of her. This drive to find some connection led me online. There I stumbled across a creative writing site where I found a poem that hit home.
Friendship is a thing,
that causes a smile but yet can also hurt you.
Feeling some connection with this author, I went to their profile to read more. There was one entitled ‘My Pain’ so I clicked on it.
Rape-violation knowing that you’ll always feel inferior.
Abuse-knowing someone has complete control over you .
Yet neither of these is as bad as knowing your best isn’t there for you.
I was in shock. I hit the back button in order to read the author’s bio.
Hi, my name is Rachel, but my best friend used to call me Ray…please don’t ask about it. I am 17 and I’m addicted to hockey. Especially the Sudbury Wolves. I currently live in a suburb just east of Sudbury itself. No it can’t be…that has to be her. Oh God, she was raped! I knew I didn’t like him for a reason. I have to find her. At that moment I grabbed my coat and car keys and left my apartment driving east. There is only one suburb east of the city. My best guess is to check there first. As soon as I got close I stopped at a phone booth and grabbed the phone book…ah ha 1542 South St. I hopped back in my car and sped off. 1536…1538…1540…1542. I parked and got out eying the house as I walked up the drive. What the heck…I’ll never know if I don’t knock. I slipped onto the front step and knocked twice quietly. Then again a little louder. After 30 seconds I heard footsteps as the door gently opened. As it did it revealed Ray. The girl I’ve fallen in love with. “I’m so so sorry,” I whispered. “Can you forgive me for being an idiot?” She looked like she was about to cry. She grabbed my hand and led me into the entry and out of the cold. I gently eyed her appearance that I hadn’t seen in nearly 6 ½ months. Wow. She looked different. Her hair was longer and she looked tired. Her chest had grown and her stomach had slightly swollen. She glanced at me carefully as if worried about what I thought. I opened my arms and pulled her to me. I whispered comforting words in her ear. “Ray, I couldn’t care less if you’re pregnant, I love you.” She simply replied ‘oh Marc what would I do without you.’
Monday, July 7, 2008
Love for the game, Love for the guy-One-Shot
“She’s Hot,” I heard my teammates say. Granted this is what they were always saying. They were never with a girl for more than a day. Today they were talking about the woman that had joined the penguin’s staff. We had yet to officially meet her but that didn’t stop the guys heads from going straight into the gutter. I mean I love these guys but they can be too much at times. “I wonder how many of you she turns down in the first hour,” I muttered as I laced my skates up for practice.
If you don’t know who I am, we’re going to fix that problem immediately. My name is Marc-Andre Fleury. I was born on November 28, 1984 outside of Montreal. That of course makes me 23 years in age. I am 6 foot 2 inches and 180 pounds. I was drafted 1st overall in the 2003 NHL draft by the Pittsburgh Penguins and I’m in my 3rd year as their starting goalie. Now that those are over with let’s get on with my story. Where were we? Oh, yeah, my teammates were being perverts and discussing our new staff member. From what I could tell she was slender but not a fake thin…if you know what I mean. She looked like the type of girl that actually ate but worked to keep her figure healthy. That’s the word I was looking for…she looks slender yet healthy. She looked to be about 5’6” or 5’7” in height too.
“Hello…hell….oooo,” She whispered snapping her figures. “Are you with me Fleury?” Crap she’s talking to me? “Huh, what?” I may have sounded dumbstruck but then again I think I was. “I said: Hi, I’m Sara, the assistant goaltending coach. Obviously you didn’t hear me.” Her voice sounded annoyed but when I looked up she was smiling. “Marc-Andre, call me Marc.” I said reaching for her outstretched hand. I think she was expecting me to shake it or at least that’s what I gathered after I kissed her hand and saw her shocked expression.
“Hey Sara, why don’t you take Marc into one of the workout rooms and get to know each other. Do some strength exercises with him.” I looked up at Meloche. Was he serious? He always helped me with my strength exercises. O top of that does he not realize that everyone in the room heard him. I’m in for it now. Thanks a bunch. Well I can’t say no. Guess I better get these skates off and hit the workout room.
Lucky for me she kept conversation simple. Questions ranged from favorite color to hockey history. At that topic she got a little edgy and I figured she didn’t want to talk about it.
The guys had finished their practice 20 minutes before we finished our workout. I thought most of the guys had left by the time I hit the showers myself. Sara was actually kind of cool. She worked me hard but not harder than I was capable of. She was 21 and had already graduated university with a sports med degree. Her hair is brunette with little bits of blonde that appeared to be totally natural. And her eyes wow…wait what am I thinking! I can’t fall for her but crap I already have. I mean she’s kind yet demanding at points. She seems to know what I can do even better than I do. I was still hitting myself upside the head as I stepped out of the showers and over to get dressed.
I could just barely hear a conversation going on outside the locker room door. The raised voices were those of my teammates. Wait! That sounds like Sara. What’s going on out there? I quickly threw on my pants(Ummm shirtless) and rushed over to see what was wrong. She sounds upset. I pulled the door open to see Jordie, Tang, Sid and Geno on one side of the hallway and Sara on the other. She was curled up in a ball on the floor sobbing like there was no tomorrow. “What’d you guys do?” Ok so I was a little angry. Jeeze. I didn’t need her quitting just because I have some idiot teammates trying to hit on her or something. “We just wanted her to join our pickup game. She said no.” This came from Jordie. “But we kept bugging her and this happened,” added Geno. I gave them a look telling them to leave and steeped across the hall towards Sara. I slid down the wall to sit beside her. “Sara,” I whispered trying to get her attention. She continued crying only quieter now. I didn’t know what to do so I followed my instinct. I gently pulled her close to me whispering quiet nothings into her hair. Nearly 20 minutes later she sat up but was still leaning against me. “You wanna talk about it?” I murmured. She nodded. She leaned into me even more while reaching into her back pocket. She flipped her phone open and handed it to me. Woah! It was our midget team picture. Dwn right in front were the goalies…me and her? “Petal?” She looked up at me and smiled. “Flower.” I can’t believe it took me this long. This was the girl that was as good if not better than me and was two years younger. I opened my arms to pull her into a tight hug. We had been best friends that one year we had played together. “Why’d you quit?” I didn’t know whether or not I was pushing it by asking her or not. “Remember my dad,” she sobbed. “He was there every game, yeah I remember him.” “He passed away not a week after we won the title. He had a brain tumor and refused any help. Without him my world collapsed. He was my everything. I haven’t laced up my skates since.” Her tears were flowing freely. I pulled her chin up so she was looking a t me. I wiped away her tears with the pad of my thumb. “I think I want to try again, but only if you’ll help me. “ “Your dad is so proud of you Sara.” With those few words I kissed her unleashing every emotion that I felt.
If you don’t know who I am, we’re going to fix that problem immediately. My name is Marc-Andre Fleury. I was born on November 28, 1984 outside of Montreal. That of course makes me 23 years in age. I am 6 foot 2 inches and 180 pounds. I was drafted 1st overall in the 2003 NHL draft by the Pittsburgh Penguins and I’m in my 3rd year as their starting goalie. Now that those are over with let’s get on with my story. Where were we? Oh, yeah, my teammates were being perverts and discussing our new staff member. From what I could tell she was slender but not a fake thin…if you know what I mean. She looked like the type of girl that actually ate but worked to keep her figure healthy. That’s the word I was looking for…she looks slender yet healthy. She looked to be about 5’6” or 5’7” in height too.
“Hello…hell….oooo,” She whispered snapping her figures. “Are you with me Fleury?” Crap she’s talking to me? “Huh, what?” I may have sounded dumbstruck but then again I think I was. “I said: Hi, I’m Sara, the assistant goaltending coach. Obviously you didn’t hear me.” Her voice sounded annoyed but when I looked up she was smiling. “Marc-Andre, call me Marc.” I said reaching for her outstretched hand. I think she was expecting me to shake it or at least that’s what I gathered after I kissed her hand and saw her shocked expression.
“Hey Sara, why don’t you take Marc into one of the workout rooms and get to know each other. Do some strength exercises with him.” I looked up at Meloche. Was he serious? He always helped me with my strength exercises. O top of that does he not realize that everyone in the room heard him. I’m in for it now. Thanks a bunch. Well I can’t say no. Guess I better get these skates off and hit the workout room.
Lucky for me she kept conversation simple. Questions ranged from favorite color to hockey history. At that topic she got a little edgy and I figured she didn’t want to talk about it.
The guys had finished their practice 20 minutes before we finished our workout. I thought most of the guys had left by the time I hit the showers myself. Sara was actually kind of cool. She worked me hard but not harder than I was capable of. She was 21 and had already graduated university with a sports med degree. Her hair is brunette with little bits of blonde that appeared to be totally natural. And her eyes wow…wait what am I thinking! I can’t fall for her but crap I already have. I mean she’s kind yet demanding at points. She seems to know what I can do even better than I do. I was still hitting myself upside the head as I stepped out of the showers and over to get dressed.
I could just barely hear a conversation going on outside the locker room door. The raised voices were those of my teammates. Wait! That sounds like Sara. What’s going on out there? I quickly threw on my pants(Ummm shirtless) and rushed over to see what was wrong. She sounds upset. I pulled the door open to see Jordie, Tang, Sid and Geno on one side of the hallway and Sara on the other. She was curled up in a ball on the floor sobbing like there was no tomorrow. “What’d you guys do?” Ok so I was a little angry. Jeeze. I didn’t need her quitting just because I have some idiot teammates trying to hit on her or something. “We just wanted her to join our pickup game. She said no.” This came from Jordie. “But we kept bugging her and this happened,” added Geno. I gave them a look telling them to leave and steeped across the hall towards Sara. I slid down the wall to sit beside her. “Sara,” I whispered trying to get her attention. She continued crying only quieter now. I didn’t know what to do so I followed my instinct. I gently pulled her close to me whispering quiet nothings into her hair. Nearly 20 minutes later she sat up but was still leaning against me. “You wanna talk about it?” I murmured. She nodded. She leaned into me even more while reaching into her back pocket. She flipped her phone open and handed it to me. Woah! It was our midget team picture. Dwn right in front were the goalies…me and her? “Petal?” She looked up at me and smiled. “Flower.” I can’t believe it took me this long. This was the girl that was as good if not better than me and was two years younger. I opened my arms to pull her into a tight hug. We had been best friends that one year we had played together. “Why’d you quit?” I didn’t know whether or not I was pushing it by asking her or not. “Remember my dad,” she sobbed. “He was there every game, yeah I remember him.” “He passed away not a week after we won the title. He had a brain tumor and refused any help. Without him my world collapsed. He was my everything. I haven’t laced up my skates since.” Her tears were flowing freely. I pulled her chin up so she was looking a t me. I wiped away her tears with the pad of my thumb. “I think I want to try again, but only if you’ll help me. “ “Your dad is so proud of you Sara.” With those few words I kissed her unleashing every emotion that I felt.
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